Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Prescription for grief...

Because Anna died the Sunday after Thanksgiving, we like to do something special to remember her on that day.  Last year I spoke cried in front of everyone at church.  This year we were a little more subtle, although Richard did wear his butterfly tie.

After church we went out to eat enchiladas.  
In 2007 when I carried Anna to the table filled with our Thanksgiving feast, she took one look and said, "Why can't we have enchiladas?"  

After lunch we went to Hollywood...Hollywood Cemetery that is.
Since college, I have enjoyed walking around cemeteries.  
It's very peaceful and reflective.  
This was one we had been wanting to visit and it seemed like a good day.

 This tombstone reads "Virginia Johnson Pegram.  Who died in the seventy eighth year of her age; and who for the sake of the living, had borne nobly her grief for the dead."   I found a stone nearby with the names of her husband and son who were apparently killed in the Civil War.  
Borne nobly her grief
I hope that can be said about me.

Here's another monument to a son who died at the age of 29.  Obviously the figure is of a grieving parent.  The inscription says, "I shall go to him, but he shall not return to me." (from 2 Samuel 12:23)

This was one of my favorites.  Of James T. Gray it say, "Well done, good and faithful servant."
Of his wife Elizabeth it says, "She hath done what she could."
I  don't want to end my life on this earth with a "Well, you did what you could."  
I want a hearty, "Well done!"

We also saw the graves of John Tyler, James Monroe, and Jefferson Davis.  Will wanted to see the graves of some movie stars (Hollywood Cemetery), but this was the best we could do.

Jacob enjoyed taking pictures of the monuments and I enjoyed taking pictures of Jacob.  I like this one because he is not making a weird face.  Of course you can't see his face, but I think the picture somehow captures him.

There was a beautiful chapel/mausoleum overlooking the James River.

I had to set the camera on a bench and use the timer because I didn't want to ask anyone for help.  Some people might think we were strange for taking family photos at the cemetery.  

 Later that night, after leading our GriefShare group, we went home and signed up to sponsor a girl in Ecuador through Compassion International.  
SO, my prescription for grief is... 
go to church, 
think about how short life really is, 
help someone else, 
and eat enchiladas.


Marianne said...

You know, one of the things I so appreciate about you all is that you do not pretend that Anna Jane's death did not happen. You are walking straight into the realities and pain of the WHOLE thing and leading your kids with you, teaching them to grieve in a healthy way! I am sure that on some level, it would seem like it would be easier to NOT talk about it, but in the long run, that would end up being more difficult for future hard times. Your family is a testimony for others!! I love the photos and the family picture is GREAT!!

PS We enjoy cemeteries too! We actually ride our bikes thru the one where Charley's parents are buried. It is a great place to ride and we always share memories of his parents!

Elaine said...

Blessed me so much! I love coming to your blog. You are such an awesome writer. Thanks for posting this!