Letting Go of Dum Dums

When someone dies you have to let go of a lot of things.  I didn't just lose a daughter.  Audra lost a best friend.  Will lost his role as big brother.    Jacob lost his innocence.  Richard lost his hope.
We had to let go of dreams.  We had to let go of dollhouses and snuggling on the couch reading out loud.  I  let go of the play kitchen, the motorized jeep, and our fourth bean bag chair.  I let go of size 4 clothes, stuffed animals, and matching pink and purple bedspreads.  As time goes by, I continue to let go of things as I'm able.
Last night it was Dum Dums.  Anna loved Dum Dums.  She liked all of the colors and choices.  She liked to hold several in her hand at the same time.  When she was on the couch, she liked to keep a crystal bowl of Dum Dums right next to her on the coffee table.  She got too sick to eat them, but she liked to play with them and give them away to people who came to visit.  After she died, I put the lid on that  dish and placed it high on a shelf so that no one would accidentally eat them.  I bought other Dum Dums to keep available at all times, but I wanted to hold on to Anna's.  Just like with the half-eaten granola bar (that Jacob ate a year later-yuck!), and the single package of pudding in my pantry, I have tried to hold on to a piece of my girl.  It's impossible.  Last night the ants found the Dum Dums.  Hundreds of ants were lining up to get a bite of the sugary goodness.  When Audra showed me what was happening, I grabbed the bowl and brushed off as many ants as I could and then dumped the suckers into a plastic bag.  This morning as I was squishing the ants in the bag, this verse came to mind...

 Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust (and ants) destroy, and where thieves break in and steal.  But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal.  Matt. 6:19-20

 It was just another reminder that my treasure is not on this earth.  ALL these things will pass away.  What is seen is temporary. So I will let go of the Dum Dums and once again embrace the unseen eternal.  I will choose to look through this "hole" in my life and see God.