Hold On

Christmas is supposed to be a happy time, but it's not always.  I have friends who are celebrating without their loved ones for the first time.  I have friends who may be celebrating their last Christmas with their child.  I have a friend whose father passed away last night so she will be flying in Christmas Day to help her mom plan a funeral.  I am praying for a pastor who was arrested last week and is still being detained while his family waits at home.  I have friends who are separated from their husbands.  Maybe Christmas is hard for you too.  Maybe you need to be reminded of the hope that we have because of Christmas.

"I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in his word I put my hope.
My soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen wait for the morning,
more than watchmen wait for the morning." (Psalm 130:5-6)

I read words in Revelation this week that filled me with hope and encouraged me to keep pressing on...
"Only hold on to what you have until I come." (Rev 2:25)
"See, I have placed before you an open door that no one can shut.  I know that you have little strength, yet you have kept my word and have not denied my name...(Rev. 3:8)
"I am coming soon.  Hold on to what you have..." (v.11)

As I join the throngs in their Christmas buying frenzy, I aknowledge that I cannot hold on to anything I own.  I cannot even hold on to the people I love.  The ONLY thing I can hold on to is the truth that I believe.  I put my hope in His word and I press on to the open door before me THAT NO ONE CAN SHUT!
Wait.
Hold on.
He is coming soon.
Come quickly Lord Jesus.

We made it!

It took us 26 hours on the road, but we made it to Kansas.  We passed MANY abandoned snow covered cars along the way.  It made us glad we waited until Sunday to leave.  Today we finally celebrated our anniversary with a lunch date and a movie.  (We saw "Blind Side" and thought it was great.)  Afterwards, we had our traditional Christmas Eve-Eve candlelight Chinese dinner with the whole family.  Now we are wrapping presents and getting ready for another snowstorm tomorrow.  Hopefully we will still be able to make our way to OKC in a few days to see Richard's folks (and all of our OKC friends!)

Snowed In

We were supposed to leave for Wichita this morning, but instead we are COVERED in snow--at least 12 inches so far.  The kids are really enjoying the winter whiteness.  We borrowed a shovel from our neighbor, but I don't think it will be enough to get us out from under all this.   I am thankful for electricity, a warm fire, and that we are not stuck on the side of the road somewhere.  I am sorry that I loaned our sleds to the people who are keeping the hamster and I am sorry that I let my pantry get depleted because we were supposed to be traveling.  Nevertheless, my goal is to enjoy today and not worry about tomorrow.  Richard says we'll get there when we get there!

Ambushed by grief

Today is our anniversary.  Today I got a root canal.  Today we are snowed in and can't leave for Kansas tomorrow as planned.  Today I was busy.  Today I wasn't planning to grieve.
Then why did the pain of the shots in my mouth cause my heart to ache and the tears to flow?  I think sometimes physical pain gives us license to release emotions we keep inside.  Yes, the shots hurt, but that's not why I was crying.  I was crying because whenever I hurt, I remember Anna's pain and it breaks my heart...again.  The doctor offered me a kleenex and kept asking if I was okay.  I couldn't speak, so I just nodded my head.  By the time it was over, I had stopped crying (who can cry for two hours?!)  It was just a reminder that grief is still my companion when I stop to remember how things used to be.

There is a story in Ezra that illustrates this dichotomy of joy and grief.  It takes place after the Israelites returned to Jerusalem to rebuild the temple that had been destroyed.
"But many of the older priests...who had seen the former temple, wept aloud when they saw the foundation of this (new) temple being laid, while many others shouted for joy.  No one could distinguish the sound of the shouts of joy from the sound of weeping"  (Ezra 3.12-13)
We are rebuilding our lives, but there are times we weep as we remember our former life.  Having my blood pressure taken, giving blood, sitting behind a woman at church who is holding her daughter, are all things that trigger memories and cause me pain.  But "Though the fig tree does not blossom and there be no grapes upon the vine.  Though the olive tree shall cast its fruit and the fields shall yield no grain, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice IN THE LORD, I will be joyful IN GOD my Savior."  (Hab. 3.17-18)

Response to comments

Marianne is right.  This is a very typical house for this area.  In fact it's hard to find anything except two-story colonials around here.  Lucky for us, we like two-story colonials!  It's not the promised land as Tasha suggested, but we will enjoy it while we journey towards our eternal home:-)
Darla, you and Bill are welcome anytime--except Christmas.  Hopefully we will be on our way to Kansas tomorrow if we don't get snowed in.

Happy Anniversary and Merry Christmas!

We have the keys!  The kids and I went over there after school and ended up playing hide-and-seek.  (What else can you do in an empty house?)  We now have a new rule:  No hiding in the refrigerator!

The Giving Tree

Here are a few photos of The Giving Tree at Chesapeake.  A big thank you to everyone who donated items for the Ronald McDonald Family Room and the art therapy program at the clinic.

Here's what Rita had to say,

"We have had so many donations so far and I can’t wait to see the end result. 

 

In addition to our Giving Tree, we have wrapped everything in yellow and included a wall with facts and ways to help. Upon entering our building you will see photos of some other children with information on their lives and diseases.

 

We also included two huge banners of donation item wish lists. It is my hope that everyone coming in the building will take time to read these stories.

 

I have Anna’s story and pictures on the actual Christmas Tree with all of the art supplies and other items.  

 

 Thank you from the bottom of my heart for allowing me to honor Anna and your family. I can never seem to find the right words to describe how your story has changed my life and the lives of so many others.

 

I hope this Giving Tree will give back to you and your family a small portion of what you have given to so many others.  Thank you for sharing your life with us."

LOVELY!  Thank YOU!!